December 2009
10 posts
3 tags
Dad Guest Blogs: Say Yes to Global Warming
Exxon announced today a new PR campaign to promote the benefits of global warming. Paris Hilton will be appearing in magazine and newspaper ads for the campaign with the slogan “Global Warming is Hot”. Ms. Hilton will be shown in sleeveless dresses and beach wear.
Exxon confirmed today that Ms. Hilton was not their first choice as spokesperson. Micheal Jackson had to drop out...
2 tags
When only open faced sandwiches can calm you
This year brought hysteria over the Swedish trilogy by Stieg Larsson, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, a modern Scandinavian thriller.
In the book, every time something upsetting happens, the stoic Swedish characters have to immediately stop and make several open faced sandwiches of pickled meats with cheese on rye bread.
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For most Swedes, when times get tough, only a series of bland...
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Facebook doesn't kill marriages, people do.
According to the Telegraph, the old adage may no longer be true.
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Starting flossing is at least as hard as quitting...
3 tags
We could let boys into Wellesley, we just wouldn't...
The Trouble with Brooklyn-Manhattan Interspecies...
- Being in a long-distance relationship
- Listening to Mexican wind instruments adulterate U2 in the subways
- The 2/3 train
- The finite number of socks in the world
- Funding Arecibo cabs
- No blankey from Mon-Wed
- Waking up and not knowing which borough you’re in
- Having to leave Brooklyn
- Swine Flu
- Snobs
- Feeling like you’re constantly on a really long walk of...
Another Gem From My Old High School Comedy Journal
“Why would America insist on building an Army of One?
We could easily be defeated by an Army of Two.
Perhaps this is just a clever method of deception.
They show up with two; we have more than one. BAM. Guam is ours…!”
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COMEDY GOLD CONTINUES!
Some tweens leaving the Juicy Couture store...
“Oh my god. I want to be buried in that store.”
This can be arranged.